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 Post subject: You know your obsession for Gadget gets abnormal when...
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 5:42 am 
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A spin-off of the already legendary Overdoing List. This one's for you Gadgephiles out there.

You know your obsession for Gadget gets abnormal when...

...you stay single because only she's your One True Love™.

...you stay single because there are no human females who resemble her enough.

...a friend finds it out, asks you about your thing for her, and your first reaction is an excited denial ("NO!!"), followed by a confession under tears after not more than two minutes.

...our registered user Gadget Hackwrench gets personal Valentine's Day greetings from you every year.

...(for the newbies who don't know her yet) so does Natasha "Gadget" Ortiz, just in case.

...your fan fictions include yourself as a self-insertion rodent character, feature Chip + Tammy and Dale + Foxglove and never ever show Sparky so your character's way to Gadget is free.

...you've broken the record for the most Gadget clones in one fan fiction.

...you wish you could log in at the Acorn Café and never ever log out again to stay your animal self forever.

...you're anti just because

...or you're only pro because you've realized that Gadget would rather be with Chip than with you, and you don't want to make her sad for your own advantage.

...you get your tranquilizers within reach before watching episodes like The Luck Stops Here or Gadget Goes Hawaiian due to the Gadget Overload.

...the only three episodes in your self-made VHS oder DVD collection that are not worn yet are To The Rescue 1, To The Rescue 2 and Dirty Rotten Diapers.

...angels are blonde mice. Can't be any different.

...your blood pressure rockets to unhealthy dimensions when you hear or read the word "gadget".

...there's no-one in real life you talk to more than your Gadget plushie.

...not even at the Acorn Café.

...which you have bought for a three-digit price, but you don't mind, and that makes her even more precious.

...you sometimes wait for three minutes until your Gadget plushie has finished her (silent/imaginary) ramble.

...you're actually worried about your Gadgetism Test score – it may be a tidbit too high.

Feel free to add more points!


Midnight

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 8:17 am 
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... you've been accused of "rat worship."
... you get incensed at that, as Gadget is a mouse.
... you still get infuriated at Inspector Gadget, even after all these years, because, well, just look at the name.

That's all for now.

God bless,

"Obi-Wan Maplewood"

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 10:43 am 
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Location: One with the Matrix...
Pro/Anti?: D+G
....you walk around wearing blue goggles
....when half the things you fix or work on explodes or spontaneously destroys itself

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 10:59 am 
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...when you border on spontaneously combusting when the animators made Gadget's nose (gasp!) black.

...when you create your own, unique variety of motor oil flavored cheese.

-... and give some to Gadget. (Be glad she can't say "no problems" because it's food. Or... can you?)

...when you get bored, you think about things like thrust coeffecients, sprockets, battery-driven oscillators, and left-hinged framwinkles. (Image)

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 11:39 am 
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Yep, that's me:

...angels are blonde mice. Can't be any different.

...which you have bought for a three-digit price, but you don't mind, and that makes her even more precious.

...you sometimes wait for three minutes until your Gadget plushie has finished her (silent/imaginary) ramble.



My two cents (it's about me again):
...you make a cartoon with Gadget even if you're not an animator.

...you have learned to draw for many years in various places for only one purpose: do draw, draw, draw Gadget!

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 7:05 pm 
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Location: Trinity test site.
Pro/Anti?: G+Neither C or D
You curse the aviation industry because they haven't developed human-sized Rangerwings for sport aircraft.

You look wistfully at your blow dryer, and wonder if it could power a vehicle.

When you wonder if you conduct electricity as well as Gadget.

When you actually test yourself on household current just to make sure.

When you think that Dynamite is logical choice as an aircraft propellent.

When you think the view is romantic, while surrounded by rotting garbage.

When you consider brakes as optional equipment.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 7:56 pm 
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. . . When your friends flinch when you say "should" or "no problems"

. . . When you refer to gadget as both your assistant and your inspiration in a semi-public presentation (Will be true when it's my turn to present over my paper. BTW, anyone that wants it, just ask for a copy)

. . . when you can't stop clarifying what you say without outside help

. . . when you enthusiastically launch into a technical lecture, and your friends start crashing without you noticing

. . . or they stop you because they've heard it a million times before

. . . if you wish people the blessing of Our Lady of the Workshop

. . . and have converted them to follow her

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 10:51 pm 
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You write stuff like....


PHANTASMAGORIA GADGETICA PART 1

By Ray Jones (joneScientific)



Not rain.
Just
Slow
Listless
Drizzle.

Not dark.
But the lights of the neon signs

And

The shop windows
Seems tired.

Job’s done for the day.

Back home, books
And magazines
Wait on the table
To be read.

On another table,
Blank sheets of paper.

Waiting for lines
And light
And shadows.

And dreams of her.

But tonight, the rooms are
Too quiet.

Too empty.

Walk down by the riverwalk.

There, people walk past.

Couples, on the other side of the zero point
On the graph.

Small groups of young men swagger,
Displaying for small groups of young women.

The latter giggle.

Or roll their eyes.

They all pass out of sight.

Sometimes, a disheveled mutterer

Drifts by.
Ghosts, too, maybe…..

Light drizzle.

Not rain.

A few people sit at tables
Under awnings

And drink coffee

Or beer.

Or expensive water.

Just over there, in concrete banks, is the river.

Lights from the restaurants

The stands

The shops and lampposts

Fall on the river.

Something down there, in the dark and the wet,,
Grabs the lights

Tears them to pieces

Throws the shreds back up to the surface.

Like confetti.

Back at home,
With infinite patience,
Empty

Silent

Rooms

Wait.

Light drizzle.

Catches in one’s hair.

Tickles one’s face.

Speckles the glasses.


Pause under a street lamp.

Wipe away said speckles.

Replace the glasses.

Now a shape stands
Just at the periphery of vision.

Short.

Anonymous.

In a dark gray raincoat.

With the big hood pulled up over it’s head.

Walk on.

In the drizzle.

The figure walks beside.

Silent.

Hips sway beneath the plastic sheet.

Glance to the side.

Hard to be sure in the glare from shop lights

But

The nose protruding out from under the hood seems

Strangely

Pink…


Another block down, the huge old tree rises up to nearly fill
The space between the buildings.
Its roots have pushed askew some of the great stone blocks
Which make the base of the stone bridge over the river there.
Just down from there is the window of the bookstore. Above the bookstore,
A hotel towers up.

Past even the top of the great tree.

Stop in front of the bookstore window.

The figure stops beside you.

Turn to look in the window.

Can’t be sure – the face is turned toward you and the hood
Of the raincoat is in the way.

Your skin goes goosebumps.

Your heart squirms in your chest.

Nothing to do but turn and look.

Her smile! Those big blue eyes –deep as space
And glowing with intelligence and good humor!

It’s her!

Impossible, of course. No way.

Her delicate little muzzle. Pink nose…
Her grin shows just a little of the incisors behind her lips.

Of course it’s her.

This mystic night…

Cool….

Drizzle…

Lights and shadows,
Full of magick.

Of course it’s her.

“Golly! Aren’t you going to invite a girl to a cup of coffee?”

You should be flustered, sure, but…

You’ve dreamed of her

Thought of her

So long.

So long, that you’ve grown comfortable with her.

“Of course, sure!”

“How about the shop a couple of blocks down?
“The bakery? They have the best pastries to go with coffee.”

“You know that place? It’s one of the best.”

“I know. I’ve gone there with you before.”

“Uh, before?”

“I’ve walked this riverwalk with you on other nights.
“When we were both lonesome.

“I felt better walking with you, even if you couldn’t see me.
“And I know you felt better too.

She held out her hand.

Three fingers and a thumb.

Small, but strong.

Warm in your hand, against the drizzle and the night.

The bored and sleepy clerk hands over the coffee, and the pastries
Wrapped in wax paper.
Rings up the purchase.

Did he even notice that your companion wasn’t human?

Apparently, nobody else seems surprised.

Doesn’t auger well for your sanity, does it?

Past caring about that now.

Pull out her chair.

She seats herself.

She pulls up the back of her raincoat and her tail curls out from underneath.

You can see she’s barefoot.

“Are you cold?” You ask.

“No, I’m fine. My feet you mean? It’s okay – I’m made for this. I’m comfortable.”

Meanwhile, she’s pulled back the hood of her raincoat.

It’s her.

The vast mane of golden hair, hemmed in on top by her big ears and her goggles
And below by her raincoat.

No one seems to care.

She sips her coffee. She nibbles her pastry – full of strawberry filling.

“This was the first meal we shared together – do you remember?

“You read that story years ago – a silly fantasy about a human rescuing me from a plane
Crash. Nursing me back to health in a warm box. First time I looked over the edge of the
box
And saw him, he was drinking coffee and eating pastry. When he saw me awake, he
offered me
A piece. I climbed out of the box with it and gestured for some coffee in a soft-drink cap I
picked up.

“We’ve been together, ever since you read that.”

She licked some icing from her lips.
Not one of those gross, overdone things in comedies.
Just the least flash of pink.
A delicate and restrained gesture.

“Gadget?”

She smiles. Her muzzle wrinkles slightly.

“I … I don’t want to lose this moment, but – you can’t be real.”
Your voice cracks with sadness.

“Look outside. Look at the darkness. Is darkness real? It’s not something.
It’s the absence of something – light. How can darkness be real if it’s the lack of something
That is real – light? Eventually, you will have to go back home. Your rooms are silent and
empty.
Silence is absence of sound – emptiness the absence of feeling and joy. How can those
things
Be real? But do you doubt that they’re real?”

She takes another sip of her coffee.

Softly: “Do you want me to be real, metaphysical contradictions and all?”

“Yes!”

Her eyes seem to grow more moist.

“Thank you!

“Sometimes,

I get…

…lonely.”

“Lonely? – what about the boys?”

“Oh, despite all the fanfictions, there isn’t anything there. Dale’s pretty much taken
With Foxglove. And, to be honest, Chip’s not my type. He’s too controlling, honestly.
And I can’t hold a conversation with him – one sentence about RNA riboswitches,
Organic semiconductors, or computer algorithms and he’s changing the subject.
There might have been something with Sparky, but … well … when I’m walking with
You, or posing for your drawings I feel … natural … like I’m at home.

“I think we need each other. And your donut’s going to get stale!”

Before, the drizzle was sad.

Melancholy.

But now,

Her hand is in yours as you walk.

Now the drizzle
Is something to cherish – to celebrate!

It wraps the two of you, almost pushing you together.

You come to the big stone stairs that lead up to the street.
Traffic noises filter down – a faint but discordant jangle.
Intrusions from a less happy world.

Gently, your companion pulls you to the side of the big block,
Topped with a stone sphere, that guards the bottom steps.

“I can’t go up with you just yet. Soon, but not yet – no, don’t ask,
There’s no explaining it. Just promise me – please – promise me?
Promise you’ll keep me in your heart?”

“I promise!”

She leans back against the stone. Her eyes are half closed and her mouth

Her mouth half open.

Lean forward – afraid – needful – shaking….

Her muzzle is quite small but she still has to tilt her head up, and you have to
Turn yours to the side before your lips can come together.

Trembling

With passion, you kiss.

You’re close to panic – should you press harder? – show her more passion?

Should you kiss lightly – respectfully – not risk turning her off by being too aggressive?

Her eyes are closed.

You press your cheek to hers.

The drizzle falls softly and slowly all around you.

You are alone.

But not really.

Promises have been made.

And you mean to keep yours!

The riverwalk to your back, you start up the old stone stairs….



And it makes you feel good to the very core of your soul that you wrote something like that!!!

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You can fool some of the people all of the time. You can fool all of the people some of the time. This is usually sufficient.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 11:07 pm 
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Location: Never the same...
...when your only reason you choose to have any mechanical skills is because Gadget does

...when you ask what would Gadget do in a normal life situation

...when you consider your attire you wear at the garge acceptible for any occasion

...when you hear "Rescue Rangers" you ask what Gadget is up to

...when you keep motor oil on you at all times just in case you meet her

...when you keep your tool set next to your Gadget plushie just incase she needs it

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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 11:14 pm 
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Location: Hamburg, Germany
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Woo-hoo!

*applauds*

Great, great work, Ray!

Ray Jones wrote:
“You read that story years ago – a silly fantasy about a human rescuing me from a plane
Crash. Nursing me back to health in a warm box. First time I looked over the edge of the
box
And saw him, he was drinking coffee and eating pastry. When he saw me awake, he
offered me
A piece. I climbed out of the box with it and gestured for some coffee in a soft-drink cap I
picked up.

“We’ve been together, ever since you read that.”

Where's that from, if I may ask?


Midnight

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2006 8:00 am 
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That was downright beautiful, Ray. Not only that, I'd wager a largely respectable portion of our fellow Gadgephiles can relate *raises hand*

To add to the growing list:

. . . When you're neither pro nor anti because it's Gadget's place to decide.
. . . and you doubt she'll ever get around to it. After all, so many things to do, so much to invent . . .

. . . If you've ever played Gadget in any form of RPG (Where're my fellow D&D players at?)

. . . If you've ever based an NPC off Gadget.
. . . And noone was surprised

. . . If you keep having to explain your goggles to anyone and everyone

. . . If you've become partial to the color lavender
. . . and Red
. . . and even Orange

. . . If you refer to your id as your "inner Hack"

. . . If you took a class to learn to read/write blueprints just so you can keep up with her. (I have an A in there, BTW. Thank you Gadget!)

. . . If you credit Gadget with helping you through every technical project you've ever done.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2006 9:13 am 
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I do not understand this 'abnormal obsession with Gadget' concept... are you trying to imply you can think about her /too/ much?

Beautiful piece, Ray. >=)


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2006 9:58 am 
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Midnight Man wrote:
Woo-hoo!

*applauds*

Great, great work, Ray!

Where's that from, if I may ask?


Midnight


Thank you! I sent you a pm about it being just an old experimental piece. I was working out what sort of changes might occur in the group dynamics if Chip and Dale married Tammy and Foxy respectively and Gadget was left mostly alone. Some parts are outside the Cafe guidelines, however, so I can't go over some of the most important points.

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It is a mighty poor excuse for a drawing that is just lines on paper...

You can fool some of the people all of the time. You can fool all of the people some of the time. This is usually sufficient.

"I want to be remembered as 'that stubborn old man who just wouldn't die'." --- Grandpa Pickles

A: "Do you believe in free will?"
B: "Do I have a choice?"


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2006 9:59 am 
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E-entity wrote:
That was downright beautiful, Ray. Not only that, I'd wager a largely respectable portion of our fellow Gadgephiles can relate *raises hand*



Thanx. It's amazing how deeply personal some symbols can become....

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It is a mighty poor excuse for a drawing that is just lines on paper...

You can fool some of the people all of the time. You can fool all of the people some of the time. This is usually sufficient.

"I want to be remembered as 'that stubborn old man who just wouldn't die'." --- Grandpa Pickles

A: "Do you believe in free will?"
B: "Do I have a choice?"


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2006 10:01 am 
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Ronnie Rabbit wrote:
I do not understand this 'abnormal obsession with Gadget' concept... are you trying to imply you can think about her /too/ much?

Beautiful piece, Ray. >=)


Thanks very much - I do appreciate it!

And yes, it is difficult to grasp the concept of being "too much of a Gadgetphile".

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It is a mighty poor excuse for a drawing that is just lines on paper...

You can fool some of the people all of the time. You can fool all of the people some of the time. This is usually sufficient.

"I want to be remembered as 'that stubborn old man who just wouldn't die'." --- Grandpa Pickles

A: "Do you believe in free will?"
B: "Do I have a choice?"


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