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 Post subject: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 4:52 pm 
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Some of the folks on MSN heard this story the other night, but it's a serious enough situation that I'll bring it before the entire Cafe.

My uncle James, who married my aunt (my mom's sister) has a rather...interesting family. He's passed on now, but my aunt still gets to deal with these folks, naturally. One day this past week, while we were away on vacation, her nephew on that side came into an altercation with his wife. The man was a raging, hardbitten alcoholic, and had been for some time, it was evident...he came home on an otherwise normal night, sloshed out of his mind, and suddenly decided, "You know...I think it'd be a good idea to kill my wife!"

So into the living room he walks, with a gun on him, and a butcher knife in his hand, throws the lady up to a wall, and proceeds to go about slitting her throat. As he's doing this, however...his 19 year old son walks in on the scene. All he sees is his mother in the final few seconds before a murder in progress...and acting on instinct, he grabbed his dad's .357 magnum from the doorside cabinet, and shot him. The dad died on Sunday.

This has been really tearing away at my aunt the past few days...there was nothing else this kid could have done and saved his mother's life, as his father was armed and dangerous...but both his grandfather and other members of the family are now expressing the sentiment that both the son and his mother should be dead and buried, rather than the murderous drunkard. It's creating an incredibly tense situation on that side of the family that is going to result in a lot more hurt than just one man's life, I'm afraid. Thankfully the police haven't charged the son with any crime (to my mind there was none committed)...but it's going to plague this family for a long time to come. All because of one man's malice and stupidity.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 4:57 pm 
My entire family except of my mum 'n sis apparently seems to wish me to be death or at least other nasty stuff because my dad died on lung cancer
and i did nothing against it. (as if i could) So i kinda can relate to this situation.

I'll keep those two in mind.

Saj.


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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 5:23 pm 
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What the... son of... [EXPLETIVE].

Don't know if I can do anything, but tell them that they did nothing wrong, probably even something right, no matter how cruel that may sound...

If there is a heaven and heck (or similar), I know where that guy is heading.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 5:32 pm 
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Got it.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 5:36 pm 
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They have my prayers that no further injustice will be visited upon them, especially for doing what had to be done.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 6:15 pm 
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I'll keep them in prayer, RR.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 7:34 pm 
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You got it, pally. I've seen situations like that before, and such bitterness didn't start there, of course. May the eyes of their understanding be enlightened. Amen.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 8:21 pm 
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He's got my backing all the way. No matter what anyone else says, he made a hard decision in a very short amount of time. His options were: not act and let his mother die, or act and shoot his father. Either way, he was in a hard spot, and made the stand-up choice. That takes great courage, but also it will hurt very badly for a long time. I will pray for his healing, and forgiveness, and that he will get the support he will surely need.

I will pray for the recovery of his mother, that she will meet the Black Winged Angel in due time far to come, and not from this. And that she receive support as well through such a terrible ordeal.

I will pray for the father's family to see the truly optionless situation the son was in and forgive him. It will be hard enough for them to heal without their pain cementing into hatred, and the pain will only be greater if they allow such hatred to tear the family apart.

And I will pray for the father, if only to lay him to rest so he causes no further problems from the ethereal end. It is spirits of his kind that are the most dangerous.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:13 pm 
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Yeah, it's an f'ed up situation and in my eyes, the son made the right choice, however distasteful the choice happened to be in the heat of the moment. Needless to say the reaction of the family doesn't surprise me sadly, I've seen it before in other (non death related) situations... nearly always a case of ignoring all the wrong that a person committed that lead to the situation in question.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:18 pm 
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:( what a sad thing this is

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:48 pm 
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Your family is in my prayers, Charlie. God has plans for everyone, and hopefully, in time, there can be some goodness that comes from this tragedy. May God's healing presence shine over all members involved.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:09 pm 
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Wow... that's a tough situation RR. I'll remember your kin in my prayers.

Later,

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2009 12:38 am 
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Will do. Man, things like that happen and you just have to feel so thankful for the people who are close to you.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2009 12:50 am 
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I'll be praying for them, RR.

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 Post subject: Re: Prayer request for one of my related families.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2009 4:37 am 
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Yes, I can see the difficulty here.

His family would remember mainly the good things about him... push the bad things aside, out of the way. They'll probably say things like "he was a bit wild at times, maybe drank too much, but he wasn't a bad person". They'll remember what he was like at three years old, before drink entered his life. They don't only see the raging alcoholic. They'd look for someone to blame for the fact that he's dead, and they blame the survivors - the people who they didn't know at three years old, the people who they didn't see grow up. And the mere fact that those two continue to exist will keep the memories alive, keep the emotions hot, keep the grudge going. And anyone trying to point out the bad side of their (brother/cousin/nephew/uncle) will simply make them more defensive, more inclined to lash out in order to avoid even thinking about what he had been doing that night.

That's what it sounds like to me, anyway.

I'll keep your aunt in my prayers.

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